Musings on Gratitude & Grace

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Gratitude is more than simple appreciation; though we can probably agree that having the feeling of thankfulness is wonderful, too. Gratitude is when we acknowledge we've received value we did nothing to earn or deserve, along with pleasant physical sensations.

We're not asked to earn those either!

The source of gratitude is unconditional giving--a gift without obligation. Between people, gratitude serves as social "glue" that bonds us and helps us evolve from being strangers to being friends.

Gratitude has healing properties: It reduces stress, shortens recovery from illness, and lifts spirits.

Gratitude is the basis of trust, faith, and optimism. The belief that the world is benevolent and our needs will be met is a steadfast ship on which to sail through life. People who fail to appreciate the value that is given to them live in a space of mental and emotional poverty. Anchored in a sea of unmet expectations, they are often unavailable for the surprises that lead to gratitude. Stuck in moments of shortage and feelings of neglect, they hold little or no space for the possibility of future happiness.

You may wonder why I've been spending so much time in recent weeks mentioning gratitude in passing in my articles. It's because I'm doing research to better understand this elixir--not because a national holiday is coming up in a few weeks. When life gets busy and people and my obligations feel demanding to me, I turn inward to the lessons of the instinctive signals built into my body. I do this because I earnestly believe life is not "supposed to," and "need not" be, a painful experience. Also because I perceive people and experiences as mirrors that reveal me to myself. Cultivating gratitude enables me in both a general way and in specific instances to flow creatively and move forward.

When I am not feeling gratitude, I notice that my work suffers. Speaking only for myself, I thrive on praise and have tremendous resistance to doing anything where appreciation is not expressed. Over the years I have therefore learned to appreciate myself and my own efforts. In the workshops I teach on authentic creativity and transformational writing, I've seen how quickly gratitude builds connection and enables people to reach for their highest vision even when they are afraid that it will elude them. So I think I am not alone in this tendency of opening my channels through praise.

The beauty of this discovery for me is that gratitude is a subjective experience. When the mirror presents itself without appreciation from outer sources, I recognize that the gratitude is not present within me. So that's when I choose to purposefully look for it, and draw a lesson from my experience. Mental and emotional constriction is always released when I am flooded with the thoughts and sensations of gratitude. Then creativity is effortless.

When I begin to push back on life, I am not there.

When I believe I am owed something, I am not there.

When I catch myself arguing for the rightness of my own point of view, I am not there.

When I feel unsafe, I am not there.

When I want to murder, I am not there.

When I choose to withhold, I am not there.

When I am judging and feeling superior, I am not there.

But I can "go there" quickly, because I am a human being and that's how we're "built."

Here's how: I just take a few conscious breaths, ask myself what I need, imagine an immediate source of fulfillment (if only in a small way), and remind myself that every seed holds the full potential of its own future and destiny. If I can find one small thing to be grateful for, I ease into being the way I like to be: open-hearted, generous, welcoming, peaceful, connected, joyful, trusting, and creative.

Gratitude is the human experience of grace. It's a sudden realization of oneness, and knowing that everything is going just as it should be. This is a non-logical, transcendent sense of belonging to something greater, something intelligent, that is acting in our best interests.